One of my former friends who lies in a shallow grave in my woods once asked, “Why do you do this kind of stuff?” She was referring to my graphic designs and artwork. I boldly answered, “Because I can.” while giving her one hell of a condescending look. Her boyfriend, or fuck-mate, or whatever sat and judged as usual. Naturally, he too gave his unsolicited opinion. Have you ever had a person pretending to be a friend only to secretly loath you? You know the kind, the kind of a shady motherfucker that something deep inside you says, “You can’t trust this asshole and the next chance you get, run him through, and gut him ASAP!”
I am certain you have and as you read this, I know that their are a few faces crossing that horizon of your brain in the recall memory processes. I showed them some work I am doing for some heavy metal bands, some authors, and an up and coming magazine both in print and online. You just might want to take a look over at my graphic department when you get the chance.
I love doing what I do and since this is a career, I never have to work another day in my fucking life. Creating worlds with words and various art is what I do from home on my Alienware Area 51 R4. The i9 Intel shreds the AMD Shredripper. The judgmental asshole came to my home one evening to boast about how much better his new machine, when it comes in, will be over mine. Well, like most young asshole-savants, he never even bothered to substantiate this with facts. I used the Intel i7’s fastest against the AMD second-rate public-assistance processor and once again like all the rest, AMD was sucking dick in the dust. Let me not even begin to compare my machine’s benchmarks against the AMD lack luster performance throughout history. Now, I want you all to take note before you attempt to argue your case on deaf ears; if you are happy with what you do, how you do your work, and whatever else, then good for you. I am not a gamer even in the spite of my GTX 1080i times three with eleven gigs of DDR5 dedicated ram on each card in SLI. I actually play my games on my Samsung 10.1 Tab A tablet. I know, right?
Now this is something I learned long time ago, Microsoft Word in any variant in a new wine sack such as Word 2016 x64 comes up just as fast on my machine as it does on my tablet or my Alienware 17xR5 Laptop or on a Dell Inspiron Walmart Special. Now, if you are in the graphics business, the video editing and or video creation business, then you need something to render the shit out of your project without waiting a month of Sundays doing so.
I also know of some highly talented and creative folks in the music business that uses such tools to create some really kick ass projects. Besides, I love listening to my music through the 7.1 Surround Sound by Creative Labs and or listening through my Logitech Artemis Spectrum 7.1 Surround Sound wireless headsets too. I know there are faster computers with the i9 chip but have not seen any with such a chip yet with the same sort of specs I have under the hood. Formula 1 kind of computing for the home. Don’t even get me started on the D-Wave Quantum Computing that can make my desktop look like something back in the Stone Age.
His complaint, you know, the judgmental asshole I took to school with stats from ZDNet, CNet, AMD, and Intel is that he thinks these companies lied to me and he thought, since I gave him i7 Intel stats, he bitched and said “I thought you have an i9?” I said, “I do, motherfucker. I just didn’t want to crush your feelings so hard. You know, since you have to have your girl drop a knee for me on that fact alone.”
Let this be a lesson to the the young and prideful to say nothing of the utterly misinformed. What a lame motherfucker, and then he complains about my Alienware 34” curved screen at 120 MHz screen. I just told him to go and suck a fucking dick. Really, like oh yeah, “I bought all this stuff to do my work on with your approval in mind. Now get out!”
He didn’t like my Ultimate Gaming Mouse that I use and is programmed for Adobe Photoshop CC 2017 and a couple of other fine Adobe applications to say nothing about the Microsoft Visual Studio 2017 Enterprise. Oh, and on my Win 10 Enterprise OS. Yeah, he had to complain like a gut-shot ape over how Microsoft works for the NSA and CIA. I had to break it to him that all Operating Systems from Linux, Windows, Apple, and Solaris are just as exposed. I also told him for every complaint he’s crying buckets about, there are features he could if only he would do his own research as in shutting some of the features down. I am so close to “disable” this jackass. He truly is a fucking half-witted cunt.
Out of all the operating systems I have been exposed to since 1986 professionally and since 1982, my favorites have been Microsoft Windows 2000 Professional and Windows 7 Ultimate x64. I am getting Windows 10 Enterprise reigned in.
Now a days, I don’t see them much only when they try to avoid me and run headlong into their house and car. Like I am really going to kill them or something.
Oh, I might use their likeness and such as characters, you know, fictional characters that gets all carved up making the Saw Franchise look like Subway Sandwich Shops. Hey, you can put a human body in an industrial size plastic drum filled with toxic chemicals that will juice them both on a slow boat to China these days.
Oh, and some things that I forgot to post in this article. Sorry about that. I truly am. I hate telling good people bad news, I really do… (sounds like the Prophet from the Matrix). Since it is 2018 and all, well, I decided to upgrade my artwork and you all shall be noticing the differences. Some are subtle though. I did ask and set up some auto-tweets inquiring the world on the new resolutions. So far not a peep. Nevertheless, rest assured that I will continue to kick some serious ass in this aspect as usual. I also have added new mockup movie posters that stars or features some of my greatest fans, followers, and such. I stopped this for some time as I realized that I was making a lot of miserable people really jealous. Call it an experiment in social networking. Yeah man, did the haters come out of the fucking woodwork. Some of these same people still come here and read to see if I would talk about them or something. I have so few unfortunates and casualties in my crimson wake that it isn’t even worth mentioning.
Thanks for reading as always,
Douglas S. Taylor